Do you feel horizonlessness?
The ‘meh’ feeling you have when thinking about your future has a name.
Earlier this year, I went on Mel Robbins’ podcast to talk about the phenomenon of horizonlessness. It’s the numb emotion you may be experiencing when you imagine your future. That conversation spread like a wildfire. Mel later told me it was her most downloaded episode in a single day. In many ways, horizonlessness is on the rise. When someone asks you what you’re looking forward to about the future, you may draw a blank. You’re not striving for a goal like you once were because nothing feels particularly motivating or exciting. Life feels like an endless grind with no clear destination. You may find yourself asking, “What’s the point?”
You’re feeling horizonlessness because your brain is built like a dam. When you’re acutely stressed, you hold it together. After the crisis has passed and you feel psychologically safe, your defenses come down and your true emotions can emerge. It’s often a deluge. This is a normal, healthy, biological process called a delayed stress response. I’ve witnessed this with many of my patients with a cancer diagnosis. During their treatment, they’re stoic. They don’t shed a tear. Once they’re declared cancer-free by their oncologist, they’re in my office in tears, confused about why they’re crying instead of celebrating. I assure them that this is an expected reaction, their delayed stress response. Like my patients, many of us have confronted our own personal struggles and traumas these last few years. The horizonlessness you now feel is your metaphorical dam breaking.
Horizonlessness is fueled by the same brain machinery that powers your stress response. If you’ve been living in survival mode, your brain is led by your amygdala. Its primary focus, by design, is your immediate self-preservation in the here and now. The other parts of your brain, like your prefrontal cortex which governs forward thinking and strategic planning, have a tough time getting back in the driver’s seat when you’re chronically stressed.
Anticipating the future is important for your well-being. Your brain thrives when it has something to look forward to. Studies using brain MRI scans have found that anticipating a future can activate certain brain regions associated with well-being. This makes sense, because forward momentum is what’s driven the human race towards progress for centuries.
How can you cultivate feeling more hopeful about the future when the present feels dismal?
First, normalize and validate this difficult experience. This feeling of horizonlessness isn’t just in your head. Contrary to what you may believe, your brain isn’t broken. You’re having a real biological experience that’s driven by your healthy and expected stress response.
Next, remind yourself that you’re not alone. Data shows that 70-74% of people have at least one feature of stress and burnout. Horizonlessness is simply one manifestation of this.
Finally, acknowledge that doing nothing often perpetuates you feeling stuck. Start small. Take one step everyday to rewire your stressed brain. Trust that change is possible and within your reach.
My simple, science-backed strategy to break the cycle of horizonlessness:
Protect your sleep (10-11 PM is the golden hour)
Move your body (even 5 minutes helps)
Connect with loved ones (community is therapeutic)
Start a gratitude journal (write down 5 things daily)
Lean into self-compassion (give your brain some grace to recalibrate)
This week’s brain reset: Pick one activity above that taps into your sense of forward momentum. Because even one small action has the power to shift your mindset and remind you that you’re not stuck.
Until next week,